"Our propensity to be competitive hinders efforts to interact collaboratively."
Dale Eilerman
The mediator must . . .
“The mediator must create a positive emotional climate, while preventing interruptions and verbal attacks.”
Chris Moore
The biggest problem with communication . . .
“The biggest problem with communication is the illusion that it has been accomplished.”
George Bernard Shaw
Yes and no!
“A “no” uttered from the deepest conviction is better and greater than a “yes” merely uttered to please, or what is worse, to avoid trouble.”
Mahatma Gandhi
Conflict is . . .
"Conflict is therefore simply the sound made by the cracks in a system, whether the system is personal, familial, relational, organizational, social, economic, or political. It is a warning light pointing at something in our environment or character that is not working for ourselves or others. It is an opportunity for rethinking and innovation. It is the birth-pang of a new way of being that is waiting to be born. It is a reminder of our interdependence, of the skills we need to improve, of what is most important in life, of what we need to do or let go of in order to escape its’ orbit and evolve to higher levels of conflict."
Ken Cloke
Beyond right and wrong . . .
"Out beyond right and wrong, there is a field. I will meet you there."
Rumi
Aggressors always destroy themselves!
"In the end, the aggressors always destroy themselves, making way for others who know how to cooperate and get along. Life is much less a competitive struggle for survival than a triumph of cooperation and creativity."
Fritjof Capra
Blame for the past!
“Our task now is not to fix the blame for the past, but to fix the course for the future.”
John F. Kennedy
Differences!
“Differences can be the sources of creativity, or they can serve to divide.”
Craig Runde
The least creative response to conflict . . .
“The easiest, the most tempting, and the least creative response to conflict within an organization is to pretend it does not exist.”
Lyle E. Schaller
Saying yes to happiness . . .
“Saying yes to happiness means learning to say no to things and people that stress you out.”
Thema Davis
Change means . . .
“Change means movement. Movement means friction. Only in the friction-less vacuum of a nonexistent abstract world can movement or change occur without that abrasive friction of conflict.”
Saul Alinsky
The leader’s job is . . .
”The leader’s job is to contain conflict—prevent the disequilibrium from going too high and the conflict from getting destructive—and simultaneously to keep people addressing the hard questions without opting for a technical fix, an easy solution, or a decision from on high.”
Ronald Heifetz and Marty Linsky
The foundation is love!
"Nonviolence is the answer to the crucial political and moral questions of our time; the need for mankind to overcome oppression and violence without resorting to oppression and violence. Mankind must evolve for all human conflict a method which rejects revenge, aggression, and retaliation. The foundation of such a method is love."
Martin Luther King
Your mirror.
"Everyone you meet is your mirror."
Ken Keyes Jr.
Conflict and Diversity!
“Our ‘opponents’ are our co-creators, for they have something to give which we have not. The basis of all cooperative activity is integrated diversity.... What people often mean by getting rid of conflict is getting rid of diversity, and it is of the utmost importance that these should not be considered the same. We may wish to abolish conflict, but we cannot get rid of diversity. We must face life as it is and understand that diversity is its most essential feature... Fear of difference is dread of life itself. It is possible to conceive conflict as not necessarily a wasteful outbreak of incompatibilities, but a normal process by which socially valuable differences register themselves for the enrichment of all concerned.”
Mary Parker Follett
Worrying is . . .
"Worrying is using your imagination to create something you don't want."
Abraham
What is happiness?
"But what is happiness except the simple harmony between a person and the life he leads."
Albert Camus
Empathy feels these thoughts . . .
“Empathy feels these thoughts: your hurt is in my heart, your loss is in my prayers, your sorrow is in my soul, and your tears are in my eyes.”
William Arthur Ward
From discord . . .
“Opposition brings together, and from discord comes perfect harmony.”
Heraclitus